I hate to admit this, but I have eaten an animal we hit during a rainstorm as we were driving down the road. Truth is, I have eaten more than one. It’s been a long time, and it was in Alabama, but I still remember the deer staring us down before leaping to its death on the cusp of our chrome bumper. At the time, growing up in the South meant eating things some people only ran over.
We took the deer home and cooked it. It was pretty tender, as it should have been. We hit it doing 65 mph. It was not the only thing we pulled from under a tire and tossed into a pan.
A possum turned into an entree just south of Andalusia on a narrow, county road as we were returning from fishing. Possums are greasy so it helps to boil them a bit. After the boiling, we tried to cook it with the fish. Both suffered from the attempt – and we suffered after it. In the end, we should have sauteed the possum in Pepto Bismol.
I have eaten quite a few recently departed frogs, or at least their legs. The other parts belong in a biology class. Fried frog legs dredged in buttermilk and seasoned flour give chicken a run for its flavor. So does rattlesnake. But be careful because a rattler – even one that has been run over – doesn’t take kindly to harvesting from the highway.
The worst thing I have ever eaten was some vague part of a turtle. Suffice it to say, turtles have been off my menu for many years now and will stay off of it. Usually, anything is good fried, but a turtle is just plain vile. Of course, maybe we should have taken the shell off.
As time has passed and I have gotten older and wiser, I am leaning more towards veggies. But the damned things never run out into the highway, and that just takes all the fun out of it.