Category Archives: Holidays

What I Got For Christmas: Fire Ants

I have written about fire ants before. But things have changed in the South. Call it global warming. Call it a fire ant invasion. Call it an environmental rash, whatever. I have experienced fire ants up close all of my … Continue reading

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This Year, I Was The Fat Man. Again.

Many years ago when my nephew (now in his early thirties) was a child, I did something so stupid it has attached itself to me like a permanent holiday appendage: I wrangled a Santa suit and scared him so badly, … Continue reading

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The Santa Fight

I can still hear wounded Santa cursing and swinging a red bamboo stick at shadows in the dark. He was an unlikely hero, a bruised saint, a twisted fantasy. He was not what any child expects at Christmas, which means … Continue reading

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Smoked House

During the holidays, Dee Briggs had an idea. “I’m going to go to the grocery store and get a turkey and take it to Extra Billy’s (a local barbecue restaurant). They’ll smoke it. You want me to get you one?” … Continue reading

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“I’ll beat you senseless with the little metal car!”

People can hear the yelling six houses down. It’s violent and ugly and causes pain and suffering. I grew up in the middle of the Braveheart-like struggle. Oh the horror, the guilt, the fake money.

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Little Girl With The Bloody Lip

{ NOTE: This story is over 40 years late. I referred to it in the previous, “The Invisible Holiday” story. As a child, I had a habit of concocting a story about the people I saw as we traveled. The … Continue reading

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1965: The Invisible Holiday

The backseat window glass of the 1962 Chevrolet Bel Aire was ice cold to the touch and I blew a frosty breath circle that clouded the passing of the Hall Brothers’ Dairy south of Montgomery. The receding amber of sunset … Continue reading

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“Did I Do That?”

I remember when the annual office holiday party was a bit like the aptly-named bar in that grisly-yet wonderfully-bad movie “From dusk til Dawn” – an endless night in a funky, dark room filled with drunks, debaucheries and more than … Continue reading

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No Thanks For This Giving

Back when Lyndon Johnson roamed the earth, we used to have a tradition in my family: No store-bought birds were allowed for the traditional Thanksgiving feast. It was a rule none of us questioned. It was as regular as the … Continue reading

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Hallowsweat

Jeff just sent me this website link featuring those old school, cheesy, plastic Halloween costumes like I used to crave as a kid: RetroCrush. These kinds of outfits (as Jeff admitted an affection for as well) smelled like the butt-end … Continue reading

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